Eyes, eye contact, windows to a soul. We reveal a lot when we share that window, allowing a peek into our very being.
I was riding along a street in Haiti years ago when it struck me how many souls, adult and child alike, were peering into mine. This openness creates vulnerability. The willingness to be vulnerable creates opportunity. I vowed that day to remain sensitive and to not stop seeing, not to stop seeing all that surrounds me. Life easily becomes like that. One lives near a mountain and soon its grandeur is lost in every day life. Another lives by the sea yet one day hears not the lapping waves above every day life’s hum. I feel today the same gut wrench, the fear that I, too, will one day lose sight of the souls we have been called to live among. The reminder reinforces my resolve to persevere.
Building word pictures is difficult for me. Oh, no, the ACT of creating them is quite simple. It is in allowing you to see, exposing the souls of the vulnerable, that it becomes difficult. We are loved, welcomed and part of a family. I want to protect their integrity while simultaneously sensing the need for others to know.
It was dark when we arrived back to town this time. The next day after delivering kids to school I become more free to see, to think to absorb and feel all that is around me. Oh, my gut – there it is again like a tight wrench. Today I am tired. One task at time, one need at a time seems impossible on day one of re-entry. Remember, we rented a home 1 1/2 short weeks prior to our trip to the U.S. We return to many tasks amid the ongoing list of needs. I share this only to give you a sense for where my feelings are; this is NOT insurmountable.
As we drive along I find myself again drawn to every set of eyes that will choose to meet my gaze. A set of pressing questions surfaced today. What does &/or will set these ASL boys apart from anyone else? What is our role in the process of their arrival to that place?
We dig in now to establish a home and a routine. So many eyes watch and wait to see what makes Matt & Tricia tick. It gives me pause….and a quick gut wrench. Nausea passes quickly as I turn my heart and mind toward our God – all knowing, all powerful, never failing, never ceasing. That calm peace passing all understanding returns. Thank you, Jesus, for finishing that unimaginable task of surrender. We seek to follow you, and in the process lead well. Imperfect. Broken. Willing. Ready with eyes wide open for what you will reveal in each next step.
We pray for you, our followers and supporters, that you are seeking God’s will in what threatens to become mundane day to day living. May you live with eyes wide open!